Grown Children Who Ignore Their Parents
Parents often find themselves struggling with parenting adult children. One of the devastating, stressful, and difficult things to deal with is how to handle Grown Children Who Ignore Their Parents
There is nothing that shatters parents more than not being loved by their children. There is a high tendency for adult children to ignore their parents and feel less guilty about it. Grown children who ignore their parents should be handled delicately where healing and rejuvenation are eyed.
There are instances when your child is experiencing a tight schedule or has had a misunderstanding with you as a parent; hence, the silence. Therefore, you must understand whether your child is ignoring you or other reasons contributing to the silence. Below are facts that you need to understand.
Indisputable signs that your adult child is ignoring you
Parenting is never a walk in the park, and some signs help you acknowledge when your adult kid is ignoring you. Below are signs to note.
Fewer or no meetings between you and your children
There is no doubt that adult children are independent and have their lives to live. Nevertheless, their level of independence shouldn’t deprive your bonding time.
Therefore, whenever you realize a change of sequence on how often you meet with your kid, you should understand that your kids ignore you. An adult kid that wants to enhance a healthy relationship between you two will always create time for you.
When your adult child calls you, not.
The world of phones has simplified things as it is always easy to communicate with people you love without meeting them in person. Therefore, whenever your child calls you not over the phone or waits until you call them for them to talk to you, they are ignoring you.
There is no doubt that you probably love your child more than they do, and you will always find yourself checking upon them. However, children who want to talk to their parents should feel obligated to call.
Children that contact you when they are in need only
You start learning about your children from other people.
Like any other institution, you will probably learn about some things about your children from other people. Nonetheless, there are things that you should always know about even before outsiders learn about them.
For instance, when you learn about your daughter’s pregnancy from your neighbors, it means your daughter has cut you off her life.
Even though grown kids are independent, they should always communicate imperative information to you in person. Nevertheless, learning the information from other people means you are ignored.
Grown kids get over-rebellious
It’s until when a grown child finds you boring that they start ignoring you. The ignorance escalates to some resentment and hatred, which births rebellion.
When your grown child gets rebellious, it shows how much they dislike you. Children should evaluate their parents’ advice and counsel, but when an adult kid dismisses counsel from their parent with no valid reason, it shows how much they despise them.
Whenever your child misses essential family meetings and instead presents some lame excuses
It is okay for a child to miss a dinner date with a parent. However, it’s not okay for the child to miss all the family meetings and essential gatherings to make excuses. A grown child who fails to attend meetings you have organized for doesn’t value spending time with you and ignoring you.
Why do grown children ignore their parents?
A child can’t ignore a parent overnight. There must be a reason as to why they are ignoring you. Below are some fundamental causes.
How you treated them as kids
Parents often treat their kids harshly, and kids develop some resentment right from childhood. The unwelcomed treatment contributes to children ignoring their parents as adults.
Therefore, take your time to examine how you treated your grown child as a kid. Where you ignored them in childhood, they will be ignoring you. Parents who took the time to enhance their relationship with their kids will always enjoy a strong bond.
Nevertheless, those parents who never availed themselves for their children will always suffer the wrath of being ignored by their adult children.
You still perceive them as kids.
Perceiving your grown children as kids will make them rebellious hence, end up ignoring you. You need to avoid undermining the value of your adult kids.
For instance, you are welcome to offer advice but not to make decisions for them. Adult children will have their belongings, which you shouldn’t touch or use without their consent.
Your adverse reactions towards their significant other
Your grown child’s significant other plays an imperative role in their life. Therefore, you should never disrespect them whatsoever. Disrespecting your grown kid’s spouse will cause problems between you two.
You might not like the spouse, but you should never show it openly to your child. You need to respect your grown child by extending the love and respect you have for them to their spouse.
When you over-control their kids
Grandchildren are a blessing, and their arrival might make you feel obligated to raise them better than you did with your grown kids. You might even find yourself spoiling them or exercising more control or them.
Whenever the parents feel intimidated, and their authority over their children threatened, they will start ignoring you by all means possible. You should, therefore, understand your place in your grandchildren’s life.
Never question your grown children’s authority or try to intimidate their control and authority in front of their kids.
When you start meddling more in their private life
It would be best if you always appreciated spending time with your grown kids. Nonetheless, you should always exercise and give them space to live their private life. Ensure to keep your distance whenever your adult child wants to spend time with their significant other and kids.
Grown kids start ignoring their parents for a valid reason. You need to understand the cause for you to augment rejuvenation. You can correct the problem thoughtfully and bring about a healthy relationship between you and your adult children. The recipe for rejuvenating the relationship is time, patience, determination, and diligence.